eating for the wrong reasons

Once again I ate some things tonight that I shouldn't have.  It wasn't a full blown binge, but I wasn't hungry and I should have left food alone.  I guess it began earlier today when I began craving Reese cups.  I can't remember what prompted the cravings.....I think it was something simple like an ad in a sale circular.  I had forgotten about the Reese cups and moved on.  I ate my on plan dinner and exercised as usual.  As I was settling down for the evening, the urge to eat came back.  It had nothing to do with hunger, so what was it related to?  Perhaps loneliness?

There was a little bit of peanut butter left in a jar that I bought for my daughter.  Notice a trend here?  Apparently I'll need to ban peanut butter from the house; at least for a while.  I ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on whole wheat.  Lots of peanut butter on the bread, and a few extra spoonfuls of peanut butter.  Then I ate some peanuts and chex mix.  Not too much; maybe a 1/2 cup full.  Then I ate a "salad".  The quotes are due to the fact that I'm using the word very loosely.  A little bit of lettuce, a ton of cheese quite a few croutons, and a large amount of dressing.  (It was fat free though.)

I don't like this trend.  The last time I did this was on the 23rd.  Only 5 days ago.  I shouldn't have eaten this stuff.  There was no real reason to do so.  Why did I?  There were so many things I could have done.  My son is home....I could have told him that I was struggling.  I could have prayed.  I could have read some of my past posts to remind myself of how I feel after I eat junk for something other than hunger.

Sometimes I get so frustrated and angry with this.