I've lost 10 more pounds, which makes a total of 111 pounds! Why is it, then, did shopping for clothes today make me grumpy and sad? I was looking for jeans. Granted, I feel that jeans are difficult to shop for no matter what weight I'm at. Even at a normal weight, I have curves. And curves aren't always easy to fit. If the hips and thigh area fits well, then the waist is too large. Should I buy boot cut, straight fit, trouser jean? Light wash, medium wash, or dark wash. 100% denim or denim with a slight stretch. (Denim with more than about 2% stretch on curvy girls is a big no-no in my opinion.) Adding to the frustration is the fact that I need petite length, which narrows the choices quite a bit. Especially in plus sizes. Then there is the price tag. Since I still have a lot of weight to loose, price is definitely a huge factor.
While loosing weight, I'm keeping my closet kind of empty. Especially pants. While a top that is a bit big may not look too bad, I feel that a pair of ill fitting, saggy pants look terrible. The two pair of jeans I currently have are much too saggy. So, I assumed when I went shopping that I would need to go down two sizes. The jeans that I looked at were offered in three fits based on body type. One fit is for straighter figures, one for slightly curvy, and one for very curvy. The first two pair I took to the dressing room were for straight figures. Silly me - what in the world was I thinking? A size smaller in this style than my saggy, baggy pair at home wouldn't even go over my hips. Depressing. The second group of contenders included a moderately curvy style and a very curvy style. The very curvy style is probably what suits me best, but they didn't have them in a size smaller than what I currently have. They were available in two sizes smaller, but they were quite a bit too tight. Considering how baggy my current jeans are, that was depressing. I finally purchased a pair of the moderately curvy style in a size smaller than my current jeans. They fit, but I don't really love how they look on me.
I need to be more positive when I'm in the dressing room. Ultimately, a size is just a number. Just. A. Number. Even normal weight people have a variety of sizes in their closet; different manufacturers size their clothing differently. There are 111 less pounds for me to have to clothe now!!!!!!! While I may not be content to stay at my current weight and clothing size, it's far better than it was when I began this journey.
One day, I will look good in jeans. For now, I'm happy to buy jeans in a smaller size. I'm happy to buy jeans at all - when I was 111 pounds heavier I didn't buy jeans because I hated how I looked in them. I purchased mostly black, grey or brown pants. Victory in a different form is still victory!