Friday, July 22, 2011

repeat

Still having lots of food cravings today.  I'm not certain of the cause; as I mentioned yesterday I assume being around lots of food during our trip might be to blame.  Thought I ate healthy, the fat content in some of the foods I ate  was higher than I'm accustomed to so that probably didn't help.

About mid-day, my mind was filled with thoughts of food.  That was all I could seem to think about.  The cravings and the inner struggle seemed to be building to the point that the only way I could find relief was to give in to the inevitable and go to the grocery store after work and buy lots of junk.  I rationalized that this seemed to be the type of event (for lack of a better word) that in the past has gotten to the point where I gave in to the urge to binge and was actually able to move on fairly quickly rather than either eat junk for days or crave junk food for days.  How can I possibly know that this would happen?  Even if I could binge and not have trouble afterwards, is that a good enough reason to behave in such a manner?   I need to change my pattern of thinking.  A binge should never be inevitable!

As I was struggling, someone commented on my weight loss.  This person is also in the process of losing weight so we talked for a minute about healthy habits.  That helped a bit.  I then texted my son.  I came very close to not doing so because I didn't want to.  The rebellious inner child in me didn't want the accountability.  But I texted him anyway.  That helped quite a bit.  He mentioned that he is having trouble today too.  He is trying to lose his last 5 or 10 pounds and is doing so by carb cycling.  It seems to be working, but it's very tough.  Saturday and Sunday are no carb days for him.  That makes my struggle seem minor!

Another great reason not to buy all of the junk food that I'd love to binge on - it's over 100 degrees!!!!  The stuff would melt between the grocery store and my car!!  

After the encouragement and with the help of some strongly flavored gum, I was able to get out of that struggle and am doing much better now.  I'm so glad that I didn't succumb to temptation.  I need to remember how that feels so I can use it as a reminder the next time I'm having difficulty!

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