This weekend, we're having a breakfast at church Sunday morning and I've been invited to a tea party Sunday afternoon. I know that there will be little or no healthy food served at these functions. Therefore, I have decided that I will not go to either.
I have some mixed emotions about my decision. Since this healthy eating plan is still in its' infancy, I did have a binge this week, and there will likely be plenty of "trigger" foods at these events I feel that avoiding them is a smart move. Another part of me feels that avoiding them altogether is pathetic. Why can't I enjoy small treats and move on? Why can't I have a few treats without craving sugar and fat for days after? It's embarrassing to explain to someone why I'm not attending these functions. Why can't I be self assured enough to say without hesitancy or embarrassment that I'm eating healthy and avoiding temptation?
Is this how an alcoholic feels when she is invited to a party where alcohol will be served? Does she miss the party because of the temptation that will be present? Why do I feel that this would be a less embarrassing explanation for missing a party then "I'm trying to eat healthy"? Is it that alcoholism is socially acceptable but binge eating disorder is not because it is so disgusting?